Today’s parenting tip is all about Self-Image. This is such a huge one and definitely an area that I need to focus on!
This verse really explains how much what we speak really affects each other!
A healthy self-image for a child is hugely important, at all ages. How many of you were called awful, horrible names as a child? I constantly got made fun of for my teeth and TO THIS DAY I still am self conscious about my freaking teeth! How crazy that something like that would stick with me! I totally think that what you speak over your child will come to pass. So choose to speak life instead of death.
The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.
They glean from your self-image.
-How you talk about yourself.
-How they see you eat.
-How much time you spend on yourself.
-How you will not leave the house until you are “perfect” or how you leave the house looking like a “slob”.
-A little girl’s self-image is formed by what a father says about her mother and what a mother says about herself.
-A little boy’s self-image is formed by how the mother speaks about the father and how the father speaks of himself.
Self-image is passed down.
This is not always true but just think of this example. If you had heavy-set parents and you made fun of them, chances are you will be anorexic or say, “Oh, well” and be heavy-set yourself. I think in these situations it can end up being extreme!
Decide not to let the media form the image of your child. Instead, you decide how your child should be groomed. Media these days can definitely ruin a little girl’s self-image. That’s why I am not really focused on my weight but by getting fit and healthy. I don’t want to be skinny, I want to be in shape!
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him.
Boys and girls are prone to “become” what they choose to wear or what they choose not to wear.
If you have a child that is “all caught up” in a certain style of clothing and is completely fanatic about it-wants to feel good and has to wear those particular jeans, then there needs to be a talk about pride and idolatry! Their image is being caught up in idolatry, instead of being portrayed in the image of Christ.
You need to know that jeans are not the issue; the jeans show the “fruit” of what’s in the child’s heart. So where do these kids get this stuff? They get it from YOU! If you live in greed, they live in greed and YOU are setting them up for poverty.
I AM GUILTY AS CHARGED!
If your kids have to have the best brands and have to be the “in thing”, and if your kids are asking for that, you have to ask yourself, why? Where does it lead to?
It leads to a “fix” that is temporary-a self-image that is temporary and not eternal. When everything ages and falls, so will their identity.
And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.
If you catch your child being “caught up in” pride over a certain “look” you can use this script as a guide to confront their heart, not their clothing… remember protection…NOT control. :)
You: “Child’s Name”, you know that we love you and we believe in you and that God has such a great future for your life. We have had talks before that if we see something popping up in your life that could hurt your future, you’ve asked us to let you know.
So, we just want to make sure that your heart is not being captured by the enemy concerning your identity. Sometimes when we make something so important in our lives, like a pair of jeans or a certain look of clothing, that if our hearts are completely set up to where we only feel good in those clothes or that those clothes are all that matters to us, it shows that the enemy has slipped something in your heart that is going to be hurtful in the future.
So, just to make sure that hasn’t happened, why don’t we go ahead and lay those absolutely favorite jeans of yours down for a few days? This way we can prove to the enemy that it is not an issue for you. We know and believe that you have a heart for God and that you want a great future and that you don’t want your life to be complicated, so this is just a ways to say “NO” to the enemy just in case pride has risen up.
I do want to add that you may not agree with much of this but I want to share my own experience. I was raised with cheap clothes from thrift stores and I cared what people thought about what I wore but I definitely appreciate nice things more today. I honestly think that kids EXPECT everything that they have and we need to break that horrible cycle. We are teaching them to love name brands and to plan for future debt. I can’t speak for you but I know that I want something different for my children! :)
Thanks for joining again this week! Please check back for next week’s which will continue talking about Self-Image. Also, if you haven’t already, be sure you enter your email on the left on the side bar to receive free monthly printables from me! The first one will be going out on April 1st! :)